What is your definition of self-esteem? And is it different from self-consciousness? Do you feel you have a balance between the two? Or perhaps more or less of one compared to the other?
Perhaps the above questions are difficult to answer, or is something you have not given much thought. As always, I give you my point of view and my thoughts, but what really matters in your life are your own thoughts and opinions. By sharing my views with you I hope to inspire to some new thoughts or perhaps a smile if you recognize yourself or someone you know in the stereotype images I give you below. But first, defining the two can be a good place to start.
What is self-consciousness?
My view of self-consciousness is that it has to do with your trust in your own ability. Self-consciousness is something I link to the ability to do things, to perform.
What is self-esteem?
My view of self-esteem is that it is the sense of your own value, as the one you are and want to be. A reflection of your self-image.
Above is nothing you have to agree on, but it is what below reasoning is based on, and perhaps you find something in that reasoning that sparks a new thought in you. When you continue to read, I want you to see below as the daily horoscope in a tabloid, nothing that I want you to identify with or see as something that defines you as a person.
Low self-esteem and low self-consciousness
If you are here, you are confident that you can’t do things, and you do not believe that you are worth anything, at least not as much as others. This probably makes you passive and dependent on others that you look up to, and expect them to help you or do things for you.
When someone praises you, it is hard for you to take in, but if someone criticizes you you take this as a confirmation of what you already know, you are less worth and less competent than others.
Your challenge is that you often talk yourself down and belittle yourself and raises others above you.
High self-esteem and low self-consciousness
If you are here, you believe in your own ability to do things, but you do not see your self-worth. Which is probably why you use you ability to get things done to compensate and try to prove your worth to others. But when you get praise for you accomplishments, you have a hard time to accept them and it does not affect your view of yourself. Criticism on the other hand strengthens your view of yourself.
Your challenge in not feeling enough is that you need to (over) perform to compensate.
Low self-esteem and high self-consciousness
If you are here, you do not believe that you can do things, at least not good enough. But you are aware of your self-worth. You create a dependence to others to either help you or do things for you. Perhaps you feel that you are worth other people’s help, which sometimes makes you expect that others will help you.
If someone expresses anything positive in relation to something you have done, it is hard for you to take in, but if you get anything positive in relation to who you are, it strengthens your self-image. Criticism for something you do confirms what you already know, as where criticism for who you are feels strange in your ears.
Your challenge is to be humble and grateful and perhaps you take some people for granted.
High self-esteem and high self-consciousness
If you are here, you believe in your ability to perform and you are aware of your self-worth. Maybe you help others and enjoy the positive feedback you get in return for who you are and what you accomplish. It is not much that can go against you, and when you get negative feedback it is hard for you to take in and it is easier for you to reject it than to reflect on if there might be something to it. Overall you feel great and have no problems with navigating your surroundings, but perhaps you avoid people that you see as negative.
Your challenge in this is that you might feel a little better and more worth than others, but in secret. After all, you are able and a really good person.
Now, here comes the most interesting part. What happens in you when you read the above?
If this sparks new thoughts or insights within you, how will you manage those thoughts and transform them to spark sustainable change in you?
Do you need to adjust somethings to find a better balance or have you already achieved a reasonable balance?